A number of lessons learned...

I recently have been reflecting a lot on the most recent General Conference and love a quote from President Packer's talk in the Saturday morning session:

One of the great discoveries of parenthood is that we learn far more about what really matters from our children than we ever did from our parents.

Last night my daughter who is learning to drive decided that the van needed to be re-parked in the garage as it was in a bit crooked. She has been practicing her driving and has the natural teenage confidence common to the age. Mom is in Hawaii and Dad is at a meeting so what else to do but rectify the problem herself? In attempting to back out of the garage she came into contact with the side of the garage causing some damage to the van and the garage itself.

Upon returning home I viewed the damage and spoke to her about the situation. In her remorse she said she was willing to pay for any required repairs not realizing that said repairs would likely cost more than she has saved over the past couple years. Upon realizing she was not going to be castigated for her mistake she went to bed relieved as did I. In the morning as I was thinking about taking her to Driver's Ed the thought occurred to me that she needed to drive, and not only that she needed to be the one to back the van out of the garage. There is a life lesson here and one I think all of us can benefit from.

As she came down the stairs I handed her the keys and informed her that she would be driving us to her class and not only that, she would be backing out of the garage. Her response was one of genuine amazement. I think it was something like, "Are you serious??", repeated several times. After looking at the result of her previous attempt it was seen that the van was in worse position than before her initial attempt. We talked through how she was to accomplish this went went through a process of discovery and identified the root of why her first attempt had ended the way it had. Under the direction of an experienced driver she was able to back out successfully and get to her class.

As we drove to her high school we talked about the lessons that could be gained through her experience:

1. I needed her to realize that she is way more important to me than any possession.
2. Mistakes are made when we go our own way lacking experience and guidance.
3. Mistakes can be corrected when turn to those who are in a position to help.

I learned some very important lessons that dovetail with the above as we liken the situation to our relationship with Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ. We are of infinite worth to the Father. We will inevitably make mistakes when we go our own way and mistakenly think we can handle everything on our own. The Savior stands ready to forgive us and lead us by the hand the way we should go. Through the direction provided by parents, leaders and the Holy Ghost we can do very difficult things with few mistakes.

As I thought about all of these things another poem quoted by President Packer in General conference came to mind:

The old crow is getting slow.

The young crow is not.

Of what the young crow does not know

The old crow knows a lot.

At knowing things the old crow

Is still the young crow’s master.

What does the slow old crow not know?

—How to go faster.

The young crow flies above, below,

And rings around the slow old crow.

What does the fast young crow not know?

—Where to go.

I am so grateful that I did not blow up...but that would not, in and of itself, have been enough. Did my daughter expect to drive to school...no. Would it have been normal in her mind to be punished or at the least not be allowed to back out of the garage for a long period of time...of course. But how much better is it when lessons can be taught. Her progress as a competent driver has taken a huge jump forward. I imagine her willingness to ask for help when she is unsure of her ability to perform a new task will also be dramatically increased.

As for the van, it is a small thing and really beyond her ability to pay. Likewise when we make mistakes the price of those is more than we can afford. Fortunately through the Atonement of our Savior the payment has been made. All that is required from us is repentance. I am glad that I did not screw this up and that Heavenly Father allowed me to learn these important lessons in a very clear way through the instrumentality of one of my children.